A message from my heart...

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is well...

I want to raise some of my feelings today. Somethings that are personal and I believe will be interesting for all my readers, friends and family to know.

Today...I was thinking about the people that are close to me. Now...I know there are a few people out there who haven't talked to me for a week, months or even years but what can I say to you guys.

I know that sometimes I have made decisions myself about our relationships. I know that maybe you see my 'ignorance' and run away from contacting me, just in case I may say 'F*ck off' but that may not be the case. I know that I have this principle that either you live with me or without me. I know it is harsh and may hurt some of you. However, I have been hurt so many times and now I do not even forgive everyone.

I know I always say we should forgive and forget and I do practice it. Then comes a time, when I feel that you are not listening to me. There comes a time when you will not see the bigger picture. There comes a time when I am right (it happens sometimes) and you may be wrong. I want to make things better but you may keep repeating the same things again and again. I want you to find the right exit but you keep going round and round the roundabout. I open my eyes and see the clear picture but you may have your eyes open but you have a blurred vision. When I have used up all my energy and I beg that you make the right choice then that is the end for me. This comes the end of the 'forgiving and forgetting' stage. Yes...if I do not forgive you then I do ignore you.

Do you think I like ignoring you? I dislike it. I want to feel loves just like everyone else does. I want to feel needed just like everyone does. I am not ashamed to say that I want to be loved and needed. I know that I give you so many chances and I make you feel loved and needed but why is it that you left me? When I need you right now...why are you not here? When I need to show you my love...why are your eyes not looking at my love? When I want you close to me...why do you run away from me? When I run away - how can you get close to me? I may be distant but I am the closest to you always, it is you that kept the distant.

I am just waiting for those few words that accept that I am right and that I was not wrong. I want you to realise that I never wanted the end the things the way they did...I wanted to prevent it but even I become weak and lose hope. I want you to realise that I always thought for the better and never for the worse. For you that is closest to me, I never want you to be away from me but if it has to be done then I will have to accept that.

This is for anyone that has not talked to me in a long time - it is just a reminder that I am always here for you but sometimes a compromise needs to be made. Sometimes there has to be a meeting point. Sometimes we have to accept the better even if it is difficult. If you get anything that is easy or go for an easy option...it does not make it better but worse for you. You appreciate things a lot more when everything is difficult for you. Do not write 'The End' in our book of relationships...try and continue with more chapters. Everything is achievable...we need to believe in ourselves and I am sure we can. Like I said...I always write for one person and will always continue to! Love you...

Take care and lots of love to everyone,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

I do not need the Man Booker's Prize!

Hey everyone,

Yeah I know...what was my post about yesterday? Well...it was obvious and to be honest the very truth. If you do not believe me...go and buy the book: How to write the Perfect Novel by Chancery Stone. Not only will it make you laugh but will actually show you the truth behind those walls of so-called creativity.

I am not a conformist and unfortunately, unless an agent is willing to take a risk by representing me...I am looking towards failure. I got a rejection slip yesterday from a literary agent...apparently in today's market, my Love is Complicated will not do so well as the market demands something else. OK...that is fine...if you are talking about genre...but I still see many romantic stories on the shelves at the bookstore I went to today! So...is it that my novel oozes creativity...it is new and is complete with a healthy bunch of characters. Where is that agent that wants that? I know of the few people that have read my novel that it is definitely a bestseller.

Fine, people do praise it to be a bestseller if an agent chooses to represent me, but even if it sells a thousand copies then fair enough. I know that my story will give you tears, it will give you happiness and I know it will entertain you. If it can entertain me then it can entertain you. I know I sound like a sour grape at the moment but I am not a sour grape. I am telling the harsh reality...I am releasing my frustrations because I fear that no agent will represent my novel.

My writing will always be there for other people's entertainment. I do not want a Man Booker's prize or anything like that. Awards need me, I do not need them. For me the biggest award is when I know that someone...somewhere has brought my book. The more people that buy it...the bigger the value of the award is. For me...the appreciation of the public is the biggest prize. Within the next few months...either I will be writing here telling you that no agent will be representing me and I will be asking what should I do. Or and I believe that this is most likely to happen that, I will have an agent that is willing to represent me. I want the latter and I know if I have the good wishes of you all and the blessings from God that this can happen!

Anyway...I hope everyone is fine and are having a great weekend!

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Am I creating a new breed of writers?

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is fine and that everyone enjoyed the humour in my post yesterday!

I was thinking a lot about what is a good book? What is great about novels that are about talking chimps, kids that ride broomsticks, talking trees, ugly characters etc? Mine is about real people and real characters. My novels will always be realisitic.

My characters are real and they are beautiful. Yes, in Love is Complicated...Rahul is a stud and so is Nikhil. Naina is a pretty girl. I do not want a literary prize...I want people to love my book, to fall in love with the plot and to fall in love with the characters. I want them to feel a little escapism but not forgetting reality at the same time.

I am sure you are wondering why I am writing this...I am not saying Love is Complicated is the best novel out there but it is not something that literary agents or publishers will be looking forward to.

'Writers are well-known to be socially inept and misfits and are apparently fat and ugly!' (according to 'How to write the perfect novel by Chancery Stone). This is not good for me as I fit into society easily and I am full of confidence when I meet people. I do say this with no ego that I am not ugly...I am fairly good-looking and I am certainly not fat! So that must mean that I am breaking barriers just with my physical appearance. I am sure there is one agent that is willing to break the mould. I am not a boring person either...so I do wonder if agents appreciate that. God knows!

Maybe this looks like I am having a moan...it is not like that. It is actually the harsh reality. I am not a misfit for the literary world...I am about to give the literary world something special! Now that could be me just being over-confident...only time and an opportunity will tell the true picture!

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Scrub that art off!

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is fine!

Just a little warning for the light-hearted and youngsters, do not read ahead if you get offended by the talk of male genitalia.

I found some funny news today on BBC. An 18-year old had painted a 60-foot penis on the roof of his parents £1 million house. There is even a picture of it.
Check it out here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/hi/newsbeat/newsid_7961000/7961224.stm

Now, I find that funny, maybe because my humour is cheap. I find it funny that this kid has to return from travelling and the poor kid has to go on his roof and clean his 60-foot penis. I will be honest, the kid has some guts to do that!

Thinking about it...if I ever did something like that...I would probably get a slap on my face for bringing 'shame' on my family. My parents would not just make me scrub it off the roof, they would probably make me paint the whole house, do the gardening, do all the house chores so I learnt my lesson. This kid is lucky that he won't get anything like that!

This reminds me of an incident when I was around 13 years old. My Dad found a 'love letter' that I was going to give to a girl that I fancied. He didn't do much, he laughed it off at the time. I am glad he took it with a sense of humour otherwise to be fair...I was expecting quite a few slaps. Instead I got the usual talk of 'You go to school to study not dating!' Ahh...the days of childhood bring a smile on my face!

My advise to all youngsters...don't paint a penis on the roof of your parents' house. They haven't got enough money for a cleaner to scrub your brilliant piece of art off, come on...it's a recession!

I hope no one has a recession on their sense of humour! If you do, then my humble apologies!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

The power of beauty!

Hello everyone...

Whatever we see is beautiful, we automatically become attached to it. That is the power of beauty. Whatever we may regard as being beautiful or holding significant beauty, the power that it gives us is totally unmatched.

I do not know what people find beautiful, it does not have to be something venereal. It can be something simple like the wind blowing into my long, black hair. Or simply seeing someone smile. It can be anything. What do we find is beautiful? Does that beauty remain with us till the end of our time? Does this beauty always possess a significant feeling in our lives?

We must ask and also answer these questions too. There is beauty even in rejection, the fact that someone does not give up on the person he loves for three to four months can be seen as beautiful. In our own creative minds we can find beauty in anything that brings a positive impact on all lives.

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

'Good ignorance'

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone is well and are enjoying their lives.

This moment feels as if it could last a lifetime but I do not want it to. I want to experience more to life, see more in life and venture into the greatness of what life can offer me.

Times have gone where I used to allow people to walk over me and do whatever they wanted and say whatever they wanted. Times have gone when I used to forgive and forget. Times have changed when I used to hate people. Now I can love everyone but not keep any personal relationship with those people.

For stupid little comments...I used to ignore them. Now I do not ignore the comments...now I ignore the person who says those stupid little comments. Why? The main reason is that I never have to deal with such comments from that person again. I rather move on with my life and not look back at what went wrong with those people. In my life...I have to be happy and that is more important for me.

I advise everyone that love everyone but never allow people to walk over you. Be adamant and be submissive when needs be. However, never take advantage over people. Treat people how you want to be treated. I can honestly say if I said a stupid comment to my friend then I would want my friend to ignore me for as long as it took for me to realise that I was wrong. I appreciate that more than my friend continuously forgiving and forgetting. Although I admire the forgiving and forgetting, it will be the 'good ignorance' from my friend that I would appreciate because that will truly teach me a lesson.

I hope everyone enjoyed this post!

Take care and lots of love...
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Stormy situations...

Hey everyone,

I am really sorry about not posting yesterday and it being rather late today. I have no Internet access in my flat...the network is playing up again so please do accept my apologies. I hope everyone is fine and are keeping well.

The wind blows harshly onto my body today and the overcast of clouds above me give me a hint of rain. I walk on and on as I struggle in forcing my feet to carry on walking forward. It seems that the weather is trying to stop me and is this a sign or a message from the Power above?

In our lives, we face every type of obstacle in our possible 'stormy' situations that we encounter on an everyday basis. Why do even the best of us have to struggle? What are we going to attain from the struggling days. From a credit crunch, failed job applications, rising debts...what gives us hope for our storm to settle?

The Power within us gives us hope. The Power that can also be perceived around us. The Power which people have many names for. I keep it simply as God. Having faith that one day this storm will settle and we may think that we find destruction after the storm has ended. However...we will not find destruction but a paradise because we fought through the stormy situations of life.

Paradise needs to happen now and should happen in this life. What if there is no after-life? What paradise will we be expecting then? Attain paradise today by maintaining positive attitudes towards our everyday life. Who knows what tomorrow will bring...forget tomorrow...what our next moment may bring...

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Honesty is not the best policy?

Hello everyone,

I hope everyone is fine. I guess I am late again to get my blog post to you yet again. I hope this is not a regular occurrence.

Again, it was a busy day with the family. Spending time with a few friends and talking about my writing to a few people too. I do a little PR now and then. I like to talk about myself alot.

People may see it as if I am an egoistic person and that I am full of arrogance. It is not like that. I rather talk about myself than other people...unless if I have to praise someone. I will always praise someone directly. In fact thinking about it...I also do criticise people if they hurt me. So in a way...I am very honest. Sometimes they do say...honesty is not the best policy. Despite, it not being the best policy...I always try to be as honest when I can. It is difficult but not impossible.

However...I must admit I hate a few things which I will talk about soon. I say I hate things but I don't necessarily hate them. These things just annoy me or upset me. I will talk about them another time.

Anyway...I shall catch you back here tomorrow. Take care and write to you soon!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

The older you get...the wiser you become!

Hi everyone,

I am very sorry for the late post. I was out with my family...was a nice day. Gave my eldest brother a surprise for his birthday. It was a nice gathering of people, friends and family.

Today, I was thinking about the unique effect of age. They say as you grow older, you grow wiser. Although I disagree with that statement because if we look at politicians, so-called religious people who tend to be older than 35...they don't grow wiser, they just grow older.

Being wise is an important quality to have in life. Fair enough it is experience that makes you become wiser by the day but it is important that we learn this earlier on. Sometimes, we should accept that other people can be right and that we can be wrong. Personally, whenever I believe someone has made a bad decision...I do my best to reverse that decision and make it a good decision. I give options on improvement and I never give up. I don't know why I do this...I don't do it often though.

I think being humble is rather important too. If we cannot be humble about our success then why be humble when we fail? When we fail...we suddenly realise that we did something wrong and we try and learn from the mistakes. However, when we succeed...we do not look and learn from what good things we did, we consume that success. We allow that success to consume our mind and hence ego is formed. Being egoistic is important too but not in the sense that people start disrespecting us because of it.

Take care everyone and I hope everyone is well!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Still going strong...

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone is fine.

I feel a little blank today, not that I am upset or anything. I am having writer's block at the moment. I am wondering what will interest you and what would grab your attention? So many questions run through my mind but they are blank questions...I think Sameer (main character in Paralysed in Evil) has finally took control over my mind.

That is only because I have just been writing a chapter for the novel just now, and I really like Sameer, his character is very strong and he is a very unpredictable person. I love his innocence as much as his guilt.

I have not had anything but rejections from literary agents for Love is Complicated at the moment. The hope for that one agent is still in my heart...going strong. There has to be one person that will love it and will represent it!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Sun's radiance...

Hi everyone,

Hope all is well and that everyone is having a good day. I had a great time with my friends last night. Although, we were late in getting Irish food, it did not stop us from having a good time.

I went for a walk today around London, along the Southbank and walked on the Millennium Pier towards the Tate Modern. It was a nice sunny day here in London and it was great having a walk in decent weather.

I love walking, it is one of my favourite hobbies. The reason why I do love it is because I always feel one with myself. I always think of new stories to write or try to come up with a new story to write. Today, I just wanted to enjoy the weather, which is finally giving its hint towards a lovely summer. As I soaked in on the Sun's radiance, I realised how much I truly loved the peaceful mother nature!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Open towards other cultures is important...

Hey everyone,

Hope everyone is well and are having a great day.

It is St.Patrick's Day today, so I might be going out to spend an evening with my Irish friends. It is great to know about other people's cultures and traditions.

I am always amazed by the way people live their lives according to their culture and traditions. I enjoy the little things that are different with these special days. I think it is important that we are all open towards other cultures. Learning from others is important and we can always find something valuable to learn from each other.

I shall be tasting Irish food and I do not know what Irish food is...so this is a first. I will be looking forward to that and that will be a unique experience for me. Enjoying other people's way of life is a learning experience and no human being on this earth knows everything. There is always time and need to carry on the learning experience.

I will catch you all tomorrow and Happy St.Patrick's Day to everyone!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

My dream house

Hey everyone,

I am back after a hectic weekend. I met up with family. Firstly, it was my youngest brother's birthday so we went ten-pin bowling. I came last on both games! I must admit that I had a good time despite losing. Spent time with my other brothers, my sister-in-law and my parents, which was a good experience since all of us had not been together in our parent's house for a good few months!

I also met up with my two best-friends and one of their girlfriends who I had went to school with. It was great catching up with them.

I got to meet my Uncle who had just come out of hospital after facing a quadruple bypass...Thank God that he is getting better and I pray to God for his good health always.

However, yesterday I was coming back from Cannock to London. On the way, there was a house in the middle of nowhere. I did not even know the location of this place, it was in a remote place, possibly a mile away from the motorway itself.

Coloured in very light pink, a balcony stretched across the house that was surrounded by trees. Beneath the balcony was a spacious porch, which would be excellent for a summer's evening drinking some tea or coca-cola. I do not drink alcohol, otherwise it would have been a nice wine. It looked as if the house had from 5-8 bedrooms at the very least. The house was high up on the hill and it stood out from the other houses that I have ever seen. Now I felt that if I have ever got this dream house, I would certainly feel like a King. It was beautiful, and the most pulling factor about this house was the fact that the house was surrounded by God's natural beauty.

I always feel that if I ever need time alone with my family, say my wife and children, this would be the ideal spot for our summer vacations. Being one with God's creation of natural beauty is possibly the best feeling to have but that does not mean we live away from society. I would like to use this house to spend time with my close friends and family members. However, this is a dream house on a dream that depends on a great and successful future. InshAllah it will all be possible! However, I want that house!

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

A special meeting on an ordinary train...

Hey everyone,

I am in Cannock today...my home town! I sat on the train for a few hours and there I was back in the town that I spent my childhood years in...a lot of my thoughts originate from here.

As I was on the train coming to this little town, I sat next to a girl that was another university student. I took out my mac and was working on approaching the literary agents and also on my novel - Paralysed in Evil.

She was looking from the corner of her eye on what I was writing until she brought the topic up. She was a British Indian herself and she recognised that I was using Indian names for my characters. She started asking about how long I have been a writer for and what inspires me to write. I explained everything to her and it was quite a unique conversation.

I told her that my writing comes from within and that whatever I write...doesn't tend to mean that I am fully aware of what I write. Sometimes, it is like a blackout...everything flashes in front of me and there it is on paper. The power of my mind and soul connects and the words flow to create a story. This lovely girl just looked at me and smiled and looked surprised at what I said. She claimed that she hardly sees anyone speak with such passion but I knew that this once in a lifetime meeting was going to have a lasting impact to me.

The best part of it, she never took my name and I never took hers. I didn't know what she did but she knew what I did. The only thing that connected us was my writing and this made me realise that my writing connects me and my readers or whoever comes into contact with me. I think now that I should have took her number at least but the beauty of just talking to her took me away into a world that I had created myself. This one meeting had made me realise that when it comes to my work...I will have to do the PR work. It took one beautiful girl, who's name I do not know to make me realise that I have to be connect with everyone.

I must say this meeting created a smile that I had not had for a long time. It brought back a smile not because I had a special relation with this girl at all but the fact that this girl made me feel special without the intention of doing so. I want people to feel like that when they meet me too.

Take care everyone and I will write again to you tomorrow

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Life matters to me...

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is fine.

I am having a busy day, still approaching literary agents. I am not really at a time or a speed to stop. I might be looking at another night of reduced hours of sleep. I am going to keep this post quick and easy to read.

The matter of life exists because we make sure life matters to us. Without the acceptance of life...what is the point of living? The art is to accept life and whatever life brings to us with a smile and aim for the best!

Have a good night everyone and write to you again tomorrow!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Creating a hell for others is actually creating hell for yourself...

Hello everyone,

I would like to wish everyone a Happy Holi! May God bless everyone with a colourful life.

I hope everyone is well and are having a good day. I sent out around 18 proposals to Literary Agents today, I hope I get lucky with one of them. I must admit I am nervous about it but it is one of the best feelings to know that one day...these restless nights would lead to this one book of many on the shelves.

I was thinking today that I do not want to be two-faced...many people change but I do not want to change for the worst, I am sure this is one many of us pray for. However, what I do hate is when people say they do not lie but they lie. I find that rude and lately, I have seen people do that. I know how much it hurts, maybe that is why I never tell a lie that would hurt someone.

I also never play around with someone's feelings...how can I? I genuinely respect everyone, no matter what they have done to me. They could have said the worst things to me but would that mean I would refrain myself from praising those people. Never! If someone deserves praise then they deserve it. However, I must say...that does not mean that people should play around with people's feelings. One time...you might beg for my friendship and then the next you could be saying I am worthless and that other people are better than me...I still do not understand the logic in that.

I would make this statement...that an honest living creates happiness and peace. People who lie, who hurt people, who disrespect others, who play with other people's sentiments will only create a hell for themselves. Creating a hell for others is actually creating hell for yourself. In their attempts to create a hell in your life, they will themselves be living in hell. The pain will hit them ten times as much! I believe in this karma. Live a good life and heaven will surround you. Be my friend and I guarantee heaven in the friendship.

Take care and I will write again tomorrow.

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Please note: Heaven and hell are not used in religious/spiritual context.

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Rising to new heights...

Hi everyone,
I hope everyone is well and has had a good day!

I am in the university library doing some work regarding approaching agents. I did not get any sleep last night and tonight looks like another sleepless night for me too! i have held everything up due to my personal problems but now I am rid of those problems.

Getting rid of my problem may have been difficult but it is definitely possible and I made it possible for myself. I was keeping myself back but now I realised that at the moment, only I am worthy of my own time. I had spent three months going round and round in circles but now I have straightened my own path.

From yesterday, my level of confidence and optimism has rose to new heights and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and now that excess baggage that made my life difficult is no where in my life. It has been thrown out for good! That 'disaster' in my life is no longer a force, I am stronger and better than that force.

All I can say is that now it is me and my time with the literary agents...I hope it all goes well.

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

A new beginning...

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is well and has had a good weekend.

Again a very short post but I will hope it does well for you and that you can take something from it. Just to add...my Anonymous friend replied back to the letter...it was nice of that person. I feel privileged.

I want my readers to know that today is a new beginning for me. A new Rahul has been born...no more of how sad and depressed I am as those days are gone. I look forward to a life ahead which will be fun and enjoyable to not just me but my fans too.

I am still in the same situation as before but I decided to let things go and move forward. I should start a new beginning where the sun shines the brightest, the stars twinkle brightly and darkness has hardly any impact. From now, it is time that the best things come into my life and that I work to please my fans and my few friends and family!

God bless everyone and I still believe in love...in fact, my search for my 'Naina' continues...

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Look for the best...

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone had a peaceful Sunday and are looking forward to the week ahead.

Today, I thought I will leave my post short and simple. I think lately you have read so much that maybe some concise thoughts will do some good.

The optimism in my life is never down. I know that whatever I want...I will eventually get. However, the main aspect of that is my belief in myself and then fulfilling what needs to be done. Sometimes, I get lazy and I become pessimistic but why? What is the need for such things...life is short for that. Look for the best so that the best can come from within.

I think this week...I may have had the worst week ever...emotionally as I know that maybe my depression is not getting better but that will not stop me...from pleasing my readers. In fact, you guys get to read what is on my mind sometimes and I am sure you all appreciate that. Just remember, the dark clouds will always show the brightness of the Sun...because light is far more powerful!

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

A letter to a friend...

Hey Everyone,

I hope everyone is well and is enjoying the start of their weekend!

As I have said there has been someone that has been posting comments on the blog that is rather disturbing, however as you know, I do try to delete them in time, so that none of my readers/fans get hurt by such words.

Now, I am fine with whatever people say to me, to be honest...I have no problem but it can upset me and can hurt me too. Sometimes, it is the last thing you want to read from someone. So I decided that today, I will write 'sort-of' a letter to this person! However, before I do that...check out what this person wrote!

Posted by Anonymous to Chronicles of a Creative Writer at March 5, 2009 3:19 PM
you're gay

Posted by Anonymous to Chronicles of a Creative Writer at March 5, 2009 4:00 PM
i said ur gay

Posted by Anonymous to Chronicles of a Creative Writer at March 6, 2009 9:28 PM
It wasn't disturbing, I just called you gay.

Sorry you broke up... but it doesn't matter because you're gay, right?

Dear Anonymous,

For the first time, I am having to write personally to someone that is foolish as you. I do not know if you are a man or a woman but whatever you are...you are a homophobic. In case you did not know...homophobia is actually a criminal offence in this country.

I am writing personally because I think I need to clarify a few points! Firstly, I am not a homosexual or gay (as you call me). Now, I have nothing against people who are gay as it has nothing to do with me or my work. In fact, I see them as human beings but they have different likes and dislikes. That does not mean that they are bad and certainly I will not put someone's sexuality as a reason for me to hate them. To be frank...Anonymous...I can say this...even if it makes me pompous...my views and opinions show that I am a far better person than you are!

I really do not know why you are scared of revealing your identity? Why won't you tell me your name? Keeping yourself as Anonymous is just plain silly. I am sure that you are an individual that believes in what you write...so reveal who you are. Tell me your name and I will talk to you on an even more personal level. I would definitely enjoy doing so.

Why are you writing such things? Do you know me personally? Do you know what I do everyday? What proof do you have to call me gay? From what you write...you clearly do not know me personally and if you do...you must dislike me or even hate me. Even if you do...it really does not matter to me. I know I cannot be liked by everyone because my thoughts and my life is beyond the 'normal' way people live their lives!

I want to confirm to you that I am madly in love with a girl and yes, I love her truly...so that is one reason why I am not gay! Another reason would be that...I love women too much to be homosexual...in fact it is women that turn me on. I hope that doesn't hurt your feelings!

However, I must tell you that I enjoy the fact that you come onto my blog. You read what I write and then you make a comment. You do not know how much happiness that brings to me, it makes me so satisfied that I can get you to call me 'gay' because you visit my blog and write comments to grab my attention. You must really like me! If you did not like me...why would you even visit my blog?

Lastly, I would like to send you an invite. I do not know you. You could be a man or a woman. I would like to invite you to spend a night with me...no...not like that. Do not get your hopes up! We will go out to the city of London, I will pay for your journey and we will go to a few bars or clubs and I can go and flirt with women and if you are a guy...you can flirt with girls...or men...whatever your preference may be. If you are a girl...you can get a guy or a girl to flirt with. It is an open invitation and I will be giving you one night to hit the town with me whenever you wish. I promise you there will be nothing sexual on my side! We will just go out to the city like friends! If you do not accept it...it'll be your loss not mine! Also, please my request is that stop with the 'gay' comments and be more constructive with your time! I honestly do not have the time for such low-thinkers, narrow-minded and most of all...people who are 'homophobic' like yourself commenting on my blog. Grow up and understand that this world is diverse and that unity is what true human beings want in this diverse world!

Take care and all the best in life!
Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

P.s. I hope my readers enjoyed the humour in this post!

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Acceptance time or....

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is fine! I have had a busy day today and I just have a few minutes to spare with you.

Yesterday, some 'clever' person decided to leave some rude comments on the blog, I had to delete them and they were rather disturbing. However, I will definitely talk about what was said on a different day!

It's Friday and I am not sure what to do tonight, maybe go out or stay in and do some work. I am not entirely sure yet. I did not sleep much last night either, which is not very good. Last night was tough for me, as usual before I go to bed...I tend to clear all my thoughts and once I do that...I am one on one with my thoughts and feelings. I must admit this is the worst time I have had in my life. I do not fail to admit that I am depressed because it is true, I am depressed.

This time, I cried because I felt like I had failed to keep something special in my life and that maybe what was special to me, was not special to that other person. I cried and cried and before I knew it, it was the early hours of the morning. My heart felt numb, I could feel my body closing up and I felt like I did not have the energy to open up anymore. I felt like being a closed person and staying that way.

I had to gather my thoughts, I had to realise that the other person has probably moved on and that I do mean nothing now. I think it is time for me to forget every memory and remove each memory I had. Maybe it is time for me to open up to whatever might be in store for me in life. I am more open to death but now I am also more open to moving out of England in the next year or so. I do not want to stay in the country, that reminds me of the pain of my separated love. Maybe I can say that now is the end to what was special in my life because it does feel like it. The other person does not care about me and I have to accept it. I say that I have to accept it but let's see if I actually do! Otherwise, Let's smile and enjoy whatever we can in life!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

If someone said they could live without you...

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is well and is keeping well.

Have you ever had someone say that they can live without you? Now, if someone said that to you and they meant the world to you...how would that make you feel? Happy? Sad? Confused? Angry?

I was thinking about this situation quite a bit yesterday. Now...what would I do if someone had said that to me? I would probably leave that person alone. Fine...I leave that person alone and let them live their life the way they want to. However, what true impact would it have upon me?

Firstly, let's look at the fact. That person means the world to me...so obviously me keeping quiet and making no effort for communication will have a definite affect on me. Will I show what affect it has upon me? Probably not. If someone close to me said they could live without me, I think it would break my heart and my silence would mean that I have possibly died for that person.

Now the external aspect of me...would still be normal. I will carry on life normally...keeping myself busy. However I know, once I am by myself with my thoughts and feelings...it would depress me....depression will consume me. I know that it would because for me living without that person would be difficult, in fact impossible. I will keep on telling myself that this is what they wanted, they could live without me...they don't need me. With those thoughts...I realise that maybe this little deed of mine would be fruitful for that person and maybe I will get a little happiness from that.

Maybe I will not talk to that person ever again unless it is initiated on the other side. However, I know that this is the consequence...not of what I wanted but of what the other person wanted. I did that for someone else so that they could have an easy life...otherwise I know that my stubborn nature for wanting only the best in life, would have disturbed and annoyed that other person...arguments would have happened. I say 'would have'...because maybe they would not happen. Maybe I say 'would have' so it would make me feel less guilty for letting that person go! The things I would do just because I love and care for someone, that my own feelings are ignored by myself...

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Two extremes in life...the best and the worst!

Hi everyone,

I know it is rather early for a new post, however I have some spare time before my class starts. I hope everyone is well.

Firstly, I feel the need to explain the 'engine' behind the blog post yesterday. I was discussing the post with a friend and mentioned that the post was rather 'rigid' which I really agree with. It is meant to be rigid, it is not meant to flow. Each sentence holds a meaning on its own and can only be understood by someone that isn't really a conformist.

This makes me realise that I am not a conformist. If someone tells me that good things falls apart because better things are in store...I do not believe that. Good things that happen in life are to be treated as the best thing. The fact is simple, this word 'good' can be interpreted in any possible way. It can mean anything and is not very definitive. People who say better things are in store are people, who are conformists. I am not a conformist. I believe that if something is good...it's the best. If something is bad...it's the worst! That is how I view things...maybe this makes me an unconventional individual. I appreciate everything in life, the best or worst. If I do not know what the worst feels like, I wouldn't be able to feel the best things in life. If I didn't feel what the best feels like then I wouldn't be able to feel the worst things in life.

Maybe, we need to stop expecting better things in store. Maybe, we should appreciate what is good in our life and make it the best thing in our life. That way, if we only expect the best and not only expect 'good' then we will definitely have a better life. We'll achieve all our dreams because we know that the best feeling to have in reality is by fulfilling the dreams that we had for days, months or years. Our life should be about going for the best in life and making sure that we go for things that make us better individuals.

I always think that the power of two is the binding force of the power of one. Why? If myself and God merge together...that is the power of two and that would be my life fulfilling its every desire. After all, marriages are done with two people, a friendship is made with two people, a sibling relationship is created by two people. In fact, every type of relationship is created and kept with two people! As two people meet, it forms one relationship making the power of One the most fulfilling of all powers!

I wish everyone the best and I will write again tomorrow.

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Good things do not fall apart...good things are the best things!

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone fine and has had a good day. Best wishes to all.

I was thinking today about things that happen for a reason, whatever does happen...there is a reason behind it. Yes, I do believe that...however whenever someone does something wrong and feels guilty, I feel that is the line to use. However, things only change for the good, if both people have the intention of doing a 'good' action. A decision or words that could hurt anyone is never done with good intentions and can never be justified.

It is true that people change but they should never change for something special to break. Every relationship is special. If someone changes it is not for someone to learn to be without that person or to let go off that someone. People change only for their selfish needs and if someone changes, it should be a positive change. People should change to bring others together and closer than separated and distant.

When things go wrong...why do they go wrong? Do they go wrong so we appreciate things when they go right? So this means that if you really believe something is right then you should make sure that things go right. You don't allow things to go wrong and wrong decisions, actions and words should be kept to a minimum. There is no point trying to be innocent by thinking wrong things happen so right things can be appreciated. Wrong things should not really happen at all!

Now...can we believe lies? No...you can only believe the truth. But hey, nowadays people lie for the most silly reasons and people tend to believe lies. However, lies are not meant to be believed so that you trust no-one else but yourself. You should be able to trust others and others should not break your trust. Sometimes, people break their own trust with others not others breaking their trust. Yes, we should trust ourselves but we need to trust others. It should be our duty that nobody stops talking to us because of our lies. We should be able to have others trust in us because we are trust-worthy.

People say that sometimes good things fall apart and break so that better things fall together. I really disagree with that. Good things should never fall apart and they should never break apart. Good things are not good things, they should be seen as the best things and should be treated like that. Bad things only fall apart so you can achieve the best things in life. Good things happen and it is best to see them as the best thing happening in your life.

I hope you enjoyed this post and thank you for reading.

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

Both worlds are black and white...

Hey everyone,

I hope everyone is well and had a great weekend. My best wishes for the week ahead to you all!

Only to add things for my disastrous last week, yesterday Shah Rukh Khan did not win the best actor award at the FilmFare awards. I am sure you must have seen my post from yesterday regarding it. I feel sad when someone gives the best quality and best commercial performance that year and gets snubbed. I feel sad at that but hey, I know SRK is a person that is beyond awards now, his presence in films is enough to make me and others happy!

I still see no improvement in my personal life and now maybe, it is a mere acceptance of what is happening is creating a wall around the problem. I am not thinking about it unless I touch the bottom of my soul. I know that atleast, once in a day I touch the bottom of my soul and all that pain cames rushing back. It is upto me how long I allow it to consume me and how much it does consume me. It is like as if I am getting in depression and getting out of depression. I am depressed, I don't know if I always have been depressed in my life.

I say that I don't know if I always have been depressed in my life, for many reasons. My childhood was never easy and neither was it colourful. However, there were moments and even months when I had forgotten that my life was black and white, and that my life did have colours in them too. I want those colours back, maybe my constant return back to this blog is the fact that I know I feel those colours for a few minutes while I am writing.

I know that writing 'Paralysed in Evil' is actually bad for me, writing about a character who I know from within, I know how dark his world is...I know how happy he is and how sad he is. I know if he is depressed or not. However, what difference is in my life? When I write that novel it is black and white and when I come back to reality...it is black and white...my both worlds at the moment is mostly consumed with the colours of black and white.

Thank you for reading and I will write again tomorrow!

Take care and lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.

FilmFare is definitely NOT FilmFAIR!

Hi everyone,

After last year, seeing Shah Rukh Khan win the best actor award for ChakDe! India...I thought Filmfare was gaining back the credibility that they lost a few years ago by giving the best actor award to Hrithik Roshan for Dhoom 2 and ignoring SRKs Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna and Don – The Chase Begins.

This year, I was lucky enough to watch Jodhaa Akbar, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi and Ghajini. All three films had exceptional performances at the very least. Respectively, Hrithik Roshan for Jodhaa Akbar, Shah Rukh Khan for Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi and Aamir Khan for Ghajini. Now, out of these three performances, Hrithik wins the Best Actor award for Jodhaa Akbar...but was he good enough or even better than the other two actors?

Jodhaa Akbar won the majority of the awards but definitely was no where near being worthy of it. I found Jodhaa Akbar to be a great movie to fall asleep to. A film that would definitely be good for treating insomnia. Hrithik's performance was average. In some scenes, he was brilliant and showed us why he is one of the biggest superstars in the industry. However, in several scenes I could see an over-acting performance. There was scenes where he lacked intensity and it was no where near a top performance that was even credible to be nominated. However, if Akshay Kumar for Singh is Kinng can be nominated then Hrithik for Jodhaa Akbar definitely deserves to be nominated.

Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, the biggest grossing film overseas and a blockbuster in India. Which clearly makes this film...an all-time blockbuster. Shah Rukh Khan, who played the lead in this film gave one of the best performances not only of his career but one of the best ever performances given by any actor in the Hindi Film Industry. Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, was an interesting film, a film which spoke of simplicity and a story that only true romantics would appreciate. Shah Rukh Khan excelled in every scene, whether he played the simpleton Suri or the over the top romantic Raj. He swapped from each character easily but still making us aware that he is Suri. He could have been Raj, his alter-ego but his eyes would speak like Suri. This performance could not be repeated by anyone else, only Shah Rukh Khan could do such a role and give justice. He certainly proved to be India's top actor and also the person that deserved the award by miles.

Ghajini, the biggest grossing film in India today and rightly so, Aamir Khan not only gave a good performance in this remake from the Tamil movie of the same name, but he cleverly marketed the film to a new level. You could even say he used Shah Rukh Khan to sell his film because he spoke more of Shah Rukh Khan than he did of his own film, Ghajini. Coming to the performance, Aamir repeated what many actors did before, to play a man that is destroyed because his love has been killed. He had acted excellently in some scenes, for example when he looks at the sight of his girlfriend, who is being britually murdered by the villain. His expressions in that one scene was brilliant. However, in the rest of the scenes, he gave a good performance than kept the audience engaged in the film. However, I would admit that Aamir deserved to be nominated but he did not deserve the award for a performance that was done by his peers before. Note down, Darr for Shah Rukh Khan.

My other concern is why is Aamir Khan even nominated for any Indian award show? Everyone knows that he does not accept awards so why even nominate him? If he won, would you give the award to a man that doesn't respect the awards and calls them flawed? It is stupid and silly, only nominate those people that respect awards from everywhere. If Aamir only prefers the Oscars, then let him keep running for them, if he only goes to the Oscars then frankly, he doesn't deserve any award from any award ceremonies.

I can now say that this year, yet again, FilmFare loses its credibility. Jodhaa Akbar did not deserve most of the awards and it certainly sounds like the jury suffered with short-term memory loss and forget about two performances that were clearly better than Hrithik's for Jodhaa Akbar. No matter what people say or think, or what the Industry says or thinks, or what critics say or think...Shah Rukh Khan is the deserving person for his perfect performance for Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi. The bottom line is...FilmFare is definitely not FilmFAIR!

I hope everyone is fine and had a good weekend. Write to you again tomorrow!

Lots of love,
Rahul N. Singh

Copyright © Chronicles of a Creative Writer. 2008-2009 Rahul N. Singh. All Rights Reserved.